November 20th, 2005


First response

You know... some days are just so much fucking fun I want to sharpen the knives...

I call to check in with my mom the way I do every day (god forbid I miss one freaking time), and tell her what's happened since I talked to her yesterday at 4:00--No sis, no concert, no LotR museum exhibit, and haven't heard from Roy and we were supposed to go see "Elizabethtown" againand her first response??? Her first *freaking* response was, "Movie? Who's paying for it?"

CHRIST!!!!!! I'm forty-fucking-three years old and most difinately know how bad my financial situation is and she still feels the urge to ask me a for-shit question like that??!?!! Oh "well geez mom... I won the fucking lottery so now I no longer have to worry about paying for necessities like oh let's see.. rent and medications"! Give me a fucking break! Yes, I know I've been dependent on them for years due to my illnesses but does that truly give them the right to treat me--a full grown middle-aged-adult like a 14 year old who has the sense of a three year-old????

As if I'm not upset enough about maubast not being able to visit and all the shit were were planning to do going down the toilet, now I have to endure condescending stupid-ass questions like who is going to pay for a damn movie?? Geez mom--the fucking Movie Fairy!

I'm sad. I'm depressed. I'm missing out on things I've looked forward to for months. For what? So she can asked me stupid questions about who is paying for a goddamn movie?? How about "Oh I'm sorry she's not coming to visit." or "Maybe you can get Roy to go." But no--nothing remotely human--just worrying about who is PAYING FOR A GODDAMN MOVIE.

*rant over*
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